Short Story No.5
Imagine This
Village set for pipe upgrade
There was uproar in the village hall last night as seventy villagers voiced their fears over the new proposals for a pipe upgrade.
Representing the County Council Mr Briar expressed the opinion that conformity and equal opportunities meant that the new services would be available to everyone in remote areas of the district. Therefore the disruption was justified.
As spokesperson for the residents, Miss Match expressed the popular view that allowing everyone a free vote in this matter added to the bad feelings caused over disruption to the footpaths and parking areas.
A local well known manufacturer of pipes and tobacco said “It is time for change as most of the pipes currently in use were outdated, caused offensive odours and pollution”.
Fred Woodbine, a seventy three year old resident with hearing difficulties, stated “I’ve been smoking this pipe for nearly all my life…… no way am I changing to one of those E pipes or fags. Nobody can make me”.
At the end of the lively meeting a vote was taken resulting in 37% for and 62% against with one abstention.
The council were defeated.
Reported by Anne Jones 1st April 2020